A Day Of Remembrance...................I suppose there are people for whom the events of 9/11 hold no great meaning. I'm not one of them. I carry the sorrow and loss in my heart and soul. The scars have closed over the wound, but healing has not taken place. I'm sure when Lincoln was killed in the Ford Theatre, people thought they would never forget. And when John Kennedy was shot, we all knew exactly where we were and what we were doing when it happened. But time slips by, the years drop off the end of the decade and then the century. And
now, it's not as hard to think about. I can't see a space ahead of me, far enough distant, that I won't have this pain.
I didn't lose someone on Sept 11th 5 years ago. But I do understand loss. By the time I was 27, I had buried both grandfathers, an infant brother, my paternal grandmother, a very close cousin,
and my mom. My maternal grandmother lived on long after her youngest child(my mom) was gone. These pictures are among my most favorite....this is my Gramma F. My beloved Gram Lottie. She is young in the first picture, taken about 1943, I'm the little blond potbellied girl with the
wind in her hair. Gram Lottie had already lived with us for over a year. Her huband died unexpectedly in 1942, and she came to live with her only daugher. The other lady is my paternal grandmother, whom I never knew very well. Her husband, my paternal grandfather had died a very short time before this picture was taken. The middle picture if of both of my grandparents(maternal)with their oldest son, my Uncle Jim. The 3rd pic is of Grandma Lottie at my church camp picnic, the first day, a Sunday. I love that picture. She peers out and up at me like a little bright eyed bird. She was such a sweet, shy person, always afraid of giving offense or causing a problem or commotion. She was quiet, sweet and unassuming. Maybe having to live on the charity of others bring that about. I think about that alot. I was a young teenager at that bible camp in WI. The last picture is one I took after I was married and came home for a visit. It's my most favorite picture of her. It's everything I love about her. Her shy, sweet smile as she sits on the chair she kept on her tiny back porch. The blue morning glories in all their beauty blooming along the opposite prorch rail. The little "Jenny" Wren birdhouse, hanging among them, so the little birds, she so loved, felt safe and protected from prying eyes. I used to get to watch them from inside her screen door, at a safe distance, so I didn't frighten them. The picture had been in black and white, and I color tined the 5 X 7 with my mothers oil pencils. A few years ago, my middle sister*VBS* took the tinted picture to a store and upgraded it to be almost a colored picture. The one above was her gift to me for my birthday that year...along with a nickle dated 1940.
Right now, it still feels like I will never forget what happened to us, our country, and our loved ones on 09/11/01. Actually I HOPE I never forget what changed our nation that day. It feels like it divided the way we "mark time". It become "before 9/11" or "after 9/11", and it hurts. And on this day of remembrance, mine includes other losses in my life, of those I loved, as well as the incredible destruction that began on this day 5 years ago. I send my love, prayers and lots of big hugs to all of you, and those whom you remember.
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