Monday, June 11, 2007

The Gift of Age......

and with it comes a very special gift, time. But the trick is that 'time' is tucked into a secret compartment, and must be revealed in order to have and use . I am not old, by calendar standards.....older, yes...old?, no. But that is neither here nor there. I am old because of the gift of Wisdom, and awareness of the gift of time. And what does that matter? Not much....unless it is something that you desire and don't have. Let me tell you how 'time' unfolded today. Morning chores done(for the most part *G*), new yard furniture delivered and set up, some time spent in the garage, sorting. In the village a 'wrong' put right by a simple action; an outing with Betsy arranged, and then it was lunch time. Shopping at a LQS to use an expiring gift certificate, a snack, some rotary cutting, a late afternoon nap and then it was supper time. Quilting until 10 p.m. and then one of the NEW best parts of my day........late evening outdoors with Ebby. Sounds simple, right? And it is, but it has to "occur" to you, to do it. To make her the 'gift' of time, not knowing what the outcome will be, nor what her reactions will be, but willing to try. To find out. And find out I have...to my great delight.
Like a child who has never been to the sea, and must chase the wasves, she chases the moths of evening. Silvery white, fluttering wonder bugs to her, like the waves on the shore. It took her ONE week to venture off the pavement into the grass. And another week to get comfortable enough to lay down in the grass. She's worked her way up to 6 feet from the patio now, chasing things that flutter close to the ground. Tonight one jumped up at her and sent her falling backwards in surprise..LOL. She's like a foster child who is lacking normal childhood experiences. She's structured, disciplined, and compliant...not at all like a cat. I know very little about her first home except that she lived with a man who found something he liked better, apparently. It's not that she doesn't have 'cat' skills, but she's been brainwashed in to shallow obedience. More and more, this is falling away and there is a playful frisky kitten in there. She's become eager for the experiences. She needs lots of reassuring that it's ok and that it won't hurt her. She comes running back to my dangling fingers as a touchpoint often. And I tell her it's ok and that she's a good girl. If she's overwhelmed, we go inside and try again later. That happens often during the day. Early morning, before 6 and after 10 p.m. seem to be the best times...the world is quieter.Night is the best... we hear crickets chirping, an occasional tree frog, and lots of night flying bugs lurk about the lights on the garages. The brisk winds of the day have become gentle, soft breezes that carasses your hair and brush your face.
I prop the outer door open with the holdy thing so she can make a quick get-a-way, and I have to stay out there with her. If I get up, she runs for the door and goes in ahead of me. Tonight was a first...... I got to the door and had to call her, she was still laying on the pavement enjoying everything that being outdoors, in the coolness of evening, has to offer us. We have that gift of time.
The picture is my beloved Grandma Lottie, taken when she was in her 90's. I never think of age, or time passing that I don't think of her. She remains ageless and timelessly the person I love the most in the whole world. I won't see as many winters as she did, but the ones I have seen hold thoughts of her and the simple gifts we can have for the taking. Watching Ebby grow in confidence, trust and an interest in life has also been a gift. She begins to know that she is loved.

8 comments:

Unknown said...

Finn thank you...I started my morning with your blog today...what an inspiration you are. I'm spending the day with my 85 year old mom...she has many errands that we need to get done today.
I love hearing Ebby's progress...you and she have sure come a long, long way.

dee said...

So glad I came here first today. That's just lovely. Wonderful writing and you made it feel like we are there with you. Sweet.

Donna said...

Age is so much a state of mind isn't it? Ebby has been old before her time, and you're giving her a real gift to try out being young. Whatever someone's calendar age those who are willing to engage in life are "young" and some choose to engage in dying their living, and they are old.

Angie said...

Oh Finn, you write it so beautifully, so clearly, that I am right there with you, feeling the breezes in my hair, watching with delight as Ebby discovers her 'inner' kitten, running to you for that reassuring touch...oh Finn, you truly do touch something deep in my soul. Thank you, dear friend.

meggie said...

What a beautiful post! That is exactly how I feel about age, & aging. It is a gift.

meggie said...

What a beautiful post! That is exactly how I feel about age, & aging. It is a gift.

Libby said...

Age can be a wonderful thing - a patina that will only show through with time and experience. But it's so fun to know that some of that is reversing for Ebby now that she has come to you - a chance to recapture what was lost before.

Cher said...

another thoughtful and thought provoking post Finn...love to hear Ebby is expanding her universe-how delightful to share this special time with her. I can't think of anything more relaxing than enjoying the cool evening air and watching her.